Thoth Provoking

15-Year-Old African Kid Tells Madonna To Go ‘Have Sex’ with Herself


Dakarai Molokomme, a 15-year-old starving child from a small village in Zimbabwe, has just told , one of the most famous pop stars in the world, to  and f*** , the local media are reporting exclusively.

“Yes, it’s true, I told Madonna to go f*** herself. Do you want to know why?” Dakarai asked. “It’s the same thing every time with these snobby rich Americans. Every once in a while they come to show us their support for the so-called eradication of poverty by adopting a child from a starving family, but they actually do more harm than good. Transracial international adoptions are part of the white savior industrial complex,” Dakarai explained.

In further discussions with journalists from the media, the  stated that “none of the children here actually want to be taken away from their family and friends so they can be displayed as some kind of trophy in the homes of self-righteous singers or actors who want to score some points with the media and Oprah.”

“If they really want to help us, they should get Big Pharma to ship us some anti-retroviral drugs for the AIDS epidemic, or build schools and hospitals. If they don’t want to do that, then they can all go f** themselves!” the child told reporters.

The 15-year-old also stated that he would say the same thing to any one of those American or European “faux humanitarian posers”, except for Bono, whom he said he would also kick in the groin.

“Bono’s efforts to save the African savage from itself prove that the colonial imperative is alive and well,” Dakarai said as he walked with other village children collecting sticks to build a tree fort.


This is a hoax, but only because people strip sources. It was originally a satirical piece published two years ago, but this is a straight lift, minus source, with the age changed to make it seem more believable.

Original Satirical Article:

The original poster had their account deactivated quite some time ago.

July 2014 Author Earnings Report – Author Earnings


Look carefully at the charts in this. They make compelling viewing.

In February, we were able to announce that self-published authors are earning nearly as much as Big 5 authors combined when it comes to ebook sales on the Kindle Store. In the two quarters since, the earnings for Big 5 authors has shrunk while that for indies has grown. We can now say that self-published authors earn more in royalties than Big 5 authors, combined. This may reverse itself by the time February rolls around, but it adds weight to a recent story in The Guardian about the unsustainability of traditional publishing if authors continue to earn less while their publishers earn more.

5th Edition Basic Rules & Starter Set


Just in case you came here to see if my opinion was miraculously inverted through reading a set of finalized rules that, as far as I can tell are not at all different from the last playtest packet, I will save you the time: I still think that the game looks and plays like recycled, traditionalist shit that reeks of nostalgia (which apparently is precisely what some people were looking for).

I would say that I am surprised to see that after two years of what could laughably be described as development, the results are basically 3rd Edition with a few 4th Edition rules shoehorned in that I can only assume were deemed not too offensive to the grognards, but we already knew what the game was going to look like long before the public playtest had concluded…

So I’ve had a chance to look these over, and my conclusion is pretty much exactly the same as David Guyll’s (see the full review in the source).

5e is basically exactly what the grognards asked for: a barely-skinned, dumbed-down and inconsistent mish-mash of 2nd ed and 3e.

So: 2nd edition all over again, with your class decision basically defining everything about your character, combined with 3e’s tendency to front-load classes too much (allowing for broken multiclassing) and for everything to require a ton more prep time for far less enjoyment. And like every edition before 4e, spellcasters are pathetic at low levels and gods above 5th.

The only good parts of it? Are actually lifted straight out of 4e, renamed (to disguise them from the grognards) and dropped in.

On the bright side, while all the grognards are dropping money on the same shit over again, recycled, we still have all our materials from the only edition of this game that actually innovated and improved gameplay, so nothing stops us from continuing to play it.

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